Sunday, 8 March 2015

The 5 Stages of Sibling Spite

One of the many reasons I had another child was I thought that it would be good for the two of them to grow up together. To play with each other. To make each other smile and to generally be besties. F*ck me I got that wrong! From the minute they wake up (generally before 6am obvs) till the minute we get them into bed kicking and screaming they row, they bicker, they shout, they push, they tell tales and generally? They seem to well, kinda hate each other. There are different causes to their anger and hatred towards each other. They can be summed up like this:

Sharing (NOT)
The amount of times I say "share, share, SHARE! FOR GODS SAKE SHARE!" a day? Is unreasonable. They don't share. They pull, they grab, they hide things. They do the polar opposite of sharing. They fight over the tablet. They fight over The Gruffalo Book. They fight for twenty minutes over a free three year old Mr Tumble phone. Then it snaps. And they blame each other for not sharing. And I die a little.



Shouting
Ahhh the joy of a sibling shout off. Generally over something really important. Such as the lyrics to Annie. Yep. We had 20 minutes of shouting yesterday as one of them, I can't establish which, got the lyrics to Annie wrong. Not even 'The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow' or 'Hard Knock Life'. No, the obscure 'Little Girls' by Miss Hannigan. The shouting starts as a mild rumble and then is just two kids, standing and screaming at each other. Probably forgetting even why they started.

Sh*t Stirring
There's nothing like a tale being told. Generally taking place when you are the most busiest. That so and so has done so and so and you literally have no idea who has done what to whom or where. You make a knee jerk reaction to tell one of them off. Which results in one, both or all three of you weeping.


Scrapping
I can go to a friends house and my two will quite happily play with other children. They are kind. They are polite and they wouldn't say boo to a goose. In my house? The tear each others hair out. To be fair to them it does generally start off with a loving cuddle, that eases itself into a tumble, that results in a hair pull. And then we get back to shouting. Sigh.



Switching Sides
So you have sorted out the argument over who takes ownership of the Mr Tumble phone. The Annie soundtrack has been put on to discover real lyrics to album. Peppa has been shoved on the tele so the shouting subsides and you have got involved and calmed down three 'stirring of sh*t' episodes. And then?...the sods. They switch sides. For a moment they are unified. And they decide? They now hate you. I have noticed this is generally when I am on the toilet, or driving. To get me at my most weakest. Gits.

Sometimes there are glimpses of them liking each other. Generally when food is involved or when they are playing hide and seek. And I am sure wiser women than me will say it's just a phase. I need to suck it up and ride it out. The terrible twos were just a phase weren't they? And it's not like they lasted all the way through three and four is it? #doomed.

27 comments:

  1. I can literally see me writing this exact post in a year or so!!! My eldest is 3, a girl and youngest 4mths, a boy and already the toddler is fighting over who gets to go on the play gym!! Haha!

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    1. Ha ha ha! Mine did the same when the boy was a baby! x

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  2. Would you start looking for your passport if I said my eight and seven year old STILL do all of the above. They make the can't stand each other than of an evening will sit side by side of an evening giggling together. Sibs hey! X

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  3. Sigh. With twins I'm royally screwed aren't i?!

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  4. Maybe a third would balance it out! Joke people with 3 kids are crazy (that's me) h

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    1. Oh god I would love a third. My hub? Not so much! x

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  5. My girl / boy are 11 and 10 and STILL fight like cat and dog! We recently bought Disney Infinity for the Wii U - and it is literally THE ONLY THING they are civil with each other about - it is like some kind of Disney drug miracle!!

    But then the 4 and 3 year old want to join in and all hell breaks loose again. People with 4 kids are even madder than those with 3!! x

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    1. Ha ha ha ha! Four seems two too many!!! x

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  6. Sometimes my two are so lovely together, and people are always commenting on how they love each other. And then when we're home, they scream and push and I die a little inside too. :(

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    1. They do it to trick us. So when you say they are a nightmare at home then you look evil! x

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  7. Haha, this sounds just like me & my sister when we were little. Unfortunately it took until we both left home before we started getting on!

    Gym Bunny Mummy | Bloglovin’ | Facebook

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    1. Same here! With my sister!!! She now lives in London. This seems far enough x

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  8. Aargh! Feeling your pain. I'd like to say it gets better and we do definitely have good days, but there are still plenty of days when a child has hardly made it to the top of the stairs from getting up before a sibling starts having a go at them for no reason whatsoever.

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    1. It's the random no reasons that get me!!! Mine could fight over anything! x

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  9. Ha ha, sounds familiar! We have. 1 and 3 year old who seem to act just the same. Moments of kindness and the screaming and crying restarts! And I wonder why husband won't agree to a third?! :) x

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    1. SAME HERE!!! Ha ha ha. My hub also isn't too keen! x

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  10. Oh, so so bitterly true! Gahhh! The tale-telling is just excruciating. My oldest keeps coming back to me to remind me to exact punishment on the others for whatever tale it was he told, I'm like, LEAVE IT! Brilliant post baby! xxx

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    1. That is what my girl does. DRIVES ME MAD! x

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  11. It does get worse. Sorry. My teen and preteen have actually pulled out handfuls of each other's hair and made dents in things (belonging to me usually). Then I went and had more children too - when they were old enough to join in they did. Joy.

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  12. YES YES YES!
    I have two exactly the same and I'm fully aware that as they get older it will only get worse! (1 and 5)
    I'm pleased its not just my two.

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  13. This is my life (sigh). I'm sure third would help- maybe we need to start a support group for woman denied baby no.3 by their mean (not insane) husbands.

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  14. Reading this (and the comments) - I want to weep! My two are just getting started with this (3 and 18 months) and I just know its going to get worse. I've already decided I'm moving out when they're teens! x

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  15. My brother and I are the cause of most of each other's scars. This went on until I was about 16 and he was 14. He tried to bury me alive. I gave him concussion hitting him round the head with a pan. He threw a knife at my head. I almost ripped off his top lip with my talonesque nails. We're 37 and 35 now and get on well. Until he rugby tackles me to the floor and farts on my head. Sibs. Gotta love em!

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  16. You think it's bad now guys, just wait until they are 11 and 8 (like mine!) hah!

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  17. This is so familiar!! Mine seem to love each other but in quite an aggressive way, lots of gritted teeth extreme hugs. I know they are close, & day by day I see it improving a bit but some days are still like this from sun up to sun down. Those are the days you need wine chilling!! 😂 Louise (Pink Pear Bear)

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