8.6.14

The Heartbreak Years Begin...

Yesterday, when driving to the shops with my girl, she said "Sydney used to be my best friend at pre-school. She isn't any more. She said she doesn't want to be my best friend and won't sit next to me in class". The emotion I felt was something close to total and utter heartbreak. I wanted to go and find Sydney and have it out with her. Why's my girl not good enough? Why don't you want to be her best friend? And then remembering that Sydney is 3 years old. I came to the conclusion this would be a bit of a impractical and foolish plan, one in which would most definitely result in my arrest. Which wouldn't be ideal.

It dawned on me there and then. This is it. This is the moment when the girl starts to realise that not everything in life is hunky dory. This is when sh*t gets real. Disappointment in her short 3 years so far has been her brother accidentally breaking one of her dolls or us not having the ice lolly she wants in the freezer. In fact even when our lovely cat died (RIP Babs) we fobbed it off with her going and living in the clouds. But now we are having to deal with actual real life feelings. And feelings as you know can be bloody brutal.

The Bride to Be. Gulp.

I had a flash forward to the first time she gets dumped. Or has an unrequited love for a dreadful spotty teen boy who is just not good enough for her. Or doesn't get the grades she wants to get into university. And so on and so on. In that split second I wanted to scoop her up, pop her on my lap and just hold her close to me forever and ever. When we discussed Sydney not wanting to be her best friend (grrrr still makes me fume) I said it was OK because I was her best friend and I would ALWAYS want to sit next to her. This seemed to placate her and she started banging on about a balloon or something. But that's not going to work forever.

Not only is my girl going to have to toughen up. But I am too. My anger with someone not wanting to be my girls best friend was an actual physical reaction. My stomach turned. And this was all over a silly little toddler bicker that will inevitably blow over come Wednesday. I need to develop some sort of defence mechanism. To not show that her hurt is my hurt, but times ten. Basically I need to grow some balls. And be quick about. 'Big' school is not too far away and I'm sure in the future there is much more of this to come.

But for now? If and when my girl gets her feelings hurt again? I will pick her up. I will cuddle her. I will hold her tight. So very, very tight. That's the only protection she needs right now. I've still got a little bit of time to get my act together. Sob.

Anyone else feel like this? Or am I mad? 
Parents of older children how to you cope with your child's disappointment? 
Does it make you sad? 


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