Time to put my Big Girl Pants on...

I have a confession. For all my gobby-ness. For all my literally I have no shame-ness. I am a bit of a wimp. I am naturally self deprecating. And I always give people the benefit of the doubt. I generally have a spurt of outrage and then within 24 hours things are forgiven and everything is back to normal. I forgive, forget and then I move on. Which in some ways is a perfectly pleasant character trait. In others? Well it makes me a total p*ssy. However things? Are about to change.

One of the best thing about having children. Is it makes you want to be a better person. Not a baking, craft making, domestic goddess (as you know I'm never going to be that). It makes me want to take my character flaws, work on them and ensure that they are not inherited by my little ones. That they learn from my mistakes and that they get the best bits of me (such as karaoke skills and knowledge of Take That), and the worst bits? Pass them by.

My girl has been having a few issues with her pre-school this week. Not really a big deal and it's been sorted. But it meant that I had to stand up and be the Mother I don't really feel comfortable with being. You know the one that kicks up a fuss, the one that writes a stern letter or has a few words at the end of the day. The ball breaking, no nonsense Mum. To be honest the "Oh God here she comes again" Mother. I've had to put my big girls pants on and manned - well lady-ed up. Which is ironic really as my actual real life pants are ginormous. 

I want my girl to have the best time at school ever. I know kids will be kids and there will be times where she falls out with people. As a teacher I also know children? Are brutal monsters (only last week I experienced a "Miss you need to do your roots" thanks!). But I want her to be tougher than me, the soft edges of forgiveness are a lovely quality but on the other hand she needs to also be able to stand up for herself. She needs to be able to accept that sometimes in life? People are just d*cks.

And so do I. It's impossible to be friends with everyone all the time. It is unrealistic to think that everything is going to go your way. So whilst she is learning the little life skills you need to survive such as tying your shoe laces and putting your fingers in the right parts of a glove (God this skill is taking SO LONG to acquire) I am going to put both the metaphorical and actual big girl pants on and watch her back. Whilst trying my hardest to watch mine along the way.

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