The 'Slummy' Mummy

Today I was excited to find out that I got a small mention in an article in The Guardian. Focusing on 'real' mummy bloggers. HOORAY FAME AT LAST. I thought. HOORAY FOR GETTING A BIT OF CREDIT FOR HELPING LOADS OF MUMS! I couldn't wait to tell my Dad as I knew he would be super excited. And then I saw the headline...

And it slowly dawned on me that I was the 'slummy' part of this modern parenting myth (side note my Dad was livid). The article then went onto say that as a backlash to 'smug' parents there was a new breed of Mother. A new group of writers who live to look relatable and evidently the more difficult my day the better we look to our readers. I'm kinda used to people being pretty damming about my blog so it wasn't anything new. What I didn't like was the implication that I 'slummy mummy' was in a war against 'smug mummy'. Because? I'm not.


It is the age old bizarre world where women are pitted against each other. If you breastfed your baby then surely you despise those that bottle fed. Families that co-sleep are meant to be thought of as bonkers by those who happily tuck their babies in a cot on day 1. Evidently as I sometimes struggle with tantrums, occasionally wear a dressing gown (OK I do that quite a lot) and generally feel a lot of Mum guilt I am 'slummy'. In the same vein women who manage to cook every evening, do crafts with their kids and look immaculate are 'smug'. I am here to tell you that 'slummy' and 'smug' parents don't exist but 'different' ones do.

You would be hard pressed to find someone who thinks that they are cracking it all the time. Rather each of us have our own slummy moments as we do our smug moments. I would prefer to call them the moments where I struggle and moments where I rock. And if you think about it you have all those moments too. Sure some days it may be weighed in favour of one way or the other. One day I can be stupid shouty Mum but in the same afternoon I read a story to my kids in the best Minnie Mouse accent EVER. I have friends who I think are the most marvellous of Mums. One can knock up a sausage plait, breastfeed a baby whilst doing painting with her daughter. I don't hate her. I admire her. Just as she admires elements of my life.


I have never EVER said that I dislike people that are amazing (in their own way) at parenting. If anything I will often touch on how I wish I was better. I write about my life. A warts and all account. I don't dislike people who don't show the difficult side of being a Mother. What's good for them isn't for me. And that's fine. What's not fine is to insinuate that I am standing up against women who I deem as smug. I quite selfishly I am only really interested in my own story. I am only interested in how I am working my way through this journey of Motherhood. And of course you will come across the odd Mum who offers unsolicited advice, judges your choices and is downright mean. But they aren't smug? They are just d*cks. And they come in all walks of life don't they? Even journalism.
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