DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP GUIDE

Since becoming a Mum I found that there is a lot of pressures put on us everyday as parents. Whether it be in the media where we see a stunning Beyonce with a perfectly behaved and stylish Blue Ivy. Or from the government where one day they say we MUST puree to the next when the say PUREEING IS THE DEVIL. The most amount of pressure I find though often comes from within. The pressure to be perfect. The pressure to be chirpy and happy at all times on just one hours sleep. Having crafts activities coming out of our arse, at the same whipping up a six tier Frozen birthday cake, whilst another tiny baby is wrapped round us in a papoose and we are being all romantic with the other half.

So little. So cute. This is going to be a breeze!

I found that we beat ourselves up constantly. We spend half of our time knackered and the other half? Worrying. And it's no ruddy good. Motherhood is 'supposed' to be amazing and rewarding but if we are panicking that we are doing it wrong 99% of the time? Well that's no way to spend our time is it? Especially when the other 1% is definitely watching ruddy Peppa Pig. So if you look on the sidebar you will see 'The Don't Beat Yourself Up Guide To...'. It houses blog posts on various topics from C Sections, to PND, to Bottle Feeding, to well anything really that I feel we should lay off ourselves on.

My behaviour management working well.

Sometimes you may think I am talking utter rubbish and totally disagree with me. Other times you may like a little friendly Mother who has made numerous mistakes (lest we forget I had no clue babies needed to a) be fed in the night and b) be winded) offering a kind voice to say "we are all a bit crap sometimes but you know what? That's OK".

Teaching life skills.

But Super Nanny I am not. Gina Ford I ain't. And whilst we are at it neither if these women have children (?). Which probably means why they get to write fantastic advice. Imagine what we could do with all that good sleep and hot tea in us? I'm just muddling through the best I can. And ultimately I would like my two little tots to when they grow up, read about how I was a bit haphazard but loved them so very very much and tried my best for them. And when either of them is up at 2am, doing a feed, weeping, they can read it and go "It's OK my Mum was a bit rubbish too, and she is ACE".

Ah loving is shown through fighting.

44 comments

  1. Hi! I've recently found your blog and I have to say I LOVE it! I can relate to so much that you write about and it's so refreshing to read an honest mums views :-) I have wanted to start blogging for a while and since reading your how to guide have chosen a name, now I just need to find the confidence to start writing!

    I love the new post of 'Don't beat yourself up' as this is all I seem to do is feel guilty about everything!!

    Thank you! Kirsty x

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    1. Ah thanks Kirsty and great name! Good luck with the blog and just shout if you need any help! x

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  2. I love this idea and look forward to reading your posts! How about a don't beat yourself up guide to being a teacher and a mummy. I don't go back to school until June/July but I am already panicking about how I will fit planning/marking etc in and have time for my daughter.

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    1. There will defo be a work based one and I will probably refer back to teaching as that's my job! x

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  3. Brilliamt, absolutely love this idea. Any posts on weaning would be welcome for me as currently beating myself because L will hardly eat anything properly. Can't wait to read them all.

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    1. Yep! Weaning is on the list. The old purees non purees debate! I have done both x

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  4. Fab idea - looking forward to hearing what you come up with!

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  5. What a great idea, I love it!!! The pic of the two of them biting their toes is absolutely hilarious, I did a little snort!!!!

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  6. Such a fab idea lovely, I think we're all definitely too hard on ourselves! Can't wait to read more xxx

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  7. Hehe I LOVE this! I was properly delluded when I was pregnant and thought I was going on some huge holiday. Its why my blog is called Not my year off :) I actually thought I'd be sitting around bored drinking tea all day. Ahhh good times!

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    1. Oh god remember the days when we thought it was going to be easy??? JEEZ! We were crazy x

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  8. Fantastic idea and I have no doubt you will be marvellous at it! You could also host some gust posts maybe? Love your piccies, especially the one of your beloved offspring biting their toe nails ha ha! x x

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    1. DEFO! And will be looking for lovely people to talk about older children too! x

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  9. Great idea. From the moment you become a parent guilt sets in, nothing you do is perfect, when really....it is. We all do our best, it's good to hear we are all human

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    1. Thanks - it sure does. We are all human and everyone just tries there very very best x

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  10. Oh bless! Em, I think you are the best mum, honestly I do! We are all a bit crap at times - I hate crafts with all my heart, and have totally given up on trying to make nutritious dinners, but as you say - I hope my three look back and think that I did my best at least! It's definitely all about muddling through! Really looking forward to reading this wee series!xx

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    1. Thanks bab! We are just trying our bests and muddling through and doing what we can to get through each day happy! x

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  11. Love this idea! We're hardest on ourselves, but knowing that never stops my guilt trips from settling in. Looking forward to reading this series! :) #sharewithme

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    1. We are so hard on ourselves it is just ridic! x

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  12. Great idea but I think you're already doing this anyway bab! I like the request a topic - a bit like getting Lily Allen to write a song about doing the washing up or something :-) Xx #sharewithme

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    1. Dunno why but this comment just proper proper made me laugh! x

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  13. I love this idea hon! You're so right about how much we beat ourselves up and it def helps to know that a) you're not the only one who hasn't a clue what you're doing and b) you're not the only one who is beating yourself up about it! Looking forward to reading this series :) xx

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    1. No has any any idea of what the hell to do. We are all just blindly roaming around in the dark! x

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  14. This is such a good idea, and as I already love your posts I can't wait to read more! Xx

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  15. Love this idea. I'm really looking forward to reading this. I'm terrible at beating myself up about silly stuff xx

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  16. Wow, brilliant idea for a series hon! Love it! How cute the idea that your kids will read it in however many years time. Imagine us still blogging when we're Nans! Proper Nans on the Razz! xxx

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    1. Tipsy moaning glam Nans! I LOVE IT! x

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  17. Fab idea hun, I can't wait to read it #ShareWithMe x

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  18. Oh Emma I am really looking forward to these. I beat myself up about EVERYTHING! Literally I could make you a list... about the crafts I don't do because I am crap myself, controlling and hate the mess. Or the house never being "guest" ready. Or not writing enough on my blog, or not taking the kids outside enough during the winter rain or shine others get their wellies and raincoats out I hide! I am rubbish at a lot of it and therefore beat myself up about it all. Can't wait for your advice. Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me. #sharewithme

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    1. Oh it won't be advice more along the lines of hey we are all a bit crap so let's not worry so much! x

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  19. Sounds amazing!!! I can't wait to read any advice you throw my way!! x

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  20. I need to take a leaf out of your book and care less about it all. Now I have 4 kids I just don't have time!!! xx x

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    1. I take my hat off to anyone with four. You are amazing! x

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  21. Sounds like a great idea for a post series. I look forward to reading some. I must say I feel lucky that I don't worry that much about how I'm doing and I DO find the whole experience absolutely amazing, but there are days when it is incredibly hard - plus I am only 15 months in so, you know I've got a whole load of terrifying and confusing mothering experience to come! xx

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  22. I couldn't agree more!!! As parents, we are our own worst enemy. I think as we grow up we have this idea of what kind of parent we want to be (cue the 'I'll never do that as a mum' or the 'my kids will never be allowed to....') but when the reality sets in, and we are sooooo sleep deprived we do what we have to do as parents to get by. Then the guilt kicks in and we beat ourselves up, when really - the kids are fed, clean, happy and healthy and therefore we are doing pretty bloody well as parents. xoxo

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  23. Love this blog! It makes me want to start my own blog about mummy life

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  24. Hi Emma, I've just come across your blog and it's perfect timing as I've been having a very crap time of it lately. This has really cheered me up and made me feel much more "normal"!! We need more Mums like you in the world, I love the brutal honesty :) Look forward to reading more xx

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