Now You Are Four. A Baby No More

To my beautiful boy

Today you are four! FOUR! Four means school. Four means leaving me and going out into the big wide world. When your big sister was four it didn't seem so bad. As I had you. My baby boy. You were two and four seemed so far away. But now you're here and I can't quite believe it. Chances are you are the last child we will have in our little family. No more nappies. No more potties or teeny tiny baby gros. This birthday symbolises more to me than just you growing up. It symbolises me no longer having a baby. You're a big boy now.

I will always feel a little sorry for my baby number two. You never ever had the one on one attention your sister had. You've always had to share me. When you were tiny you had to compete with a tantruming sibling. You've always done things second which sometimes mean they don't get the attention they deserve. But being second? Also means you get to do the good stuff far sooner than your sister. Chocolate, soft play and riding around Thomas Land before you could walk. You've never known what it feels like to be alone which can only be a good thing.

You're funny. Like proper funny. You sometimes run in a room with pants on your head singing a "Booby Song" and make me cry with laughter with your dancing. You also fib a bit. Nothing major but the odd white lie here and there to keep me on my toes. All the things that naughty toddlers should have done? You did it. Drawing on walls, scribbling on my coat and blaming the dog when a present mysteriously got unwrapped under the Christmas tree. Sometimes I have to hold my breath and walk away as I want to laugh so much when I'm telling you off.

You love me in a different way to my girl. There's cuddles and kisses. There's hugs and climbing all over me. Sometimes you lick me and I love nothing more than nibbling your feet. Which I am sure will change as you turn into a teenage boy. You talk NON STOP. Which is something you've picked up from me but you don't mind not being liked. You're happy in yourself and are stubborn to the point of maddening.

My boy you are four. So big. But still so little. It maybe as you're the youngest. But when I look at you I still see a tiny baby. With your button nose and rosebud lips. Your big blue eyes and little toes. You wear a onesie to bed and if I squint a bit and sniff your head? It's as if you're back to being a few months old in a baby gro. So while my womb aches for another I'm excited for our last few months together before school. We are going to have SO much fun. And even though I won't nibble you feet when you're 15. You will always be my youngest, my baby, my beautiful boy.

Love Your Mummy xxx

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